Good Day
Today was actually as pain free of a day as I can have. I should have been cleaning and catching up on the millions of things I have to catch up on due to these headaches, but I did fun stuff instead.
I talked to Mike a bit on IM. Always a fun time, and I've really been missing him, Clint and the 776th gang. Hopefully, I'll be on more. I'm gonna try to anyway! If nothing else, I'm determined to be fixed by DNDO. If not, I think I'll cry!
Mostly I hung out with the kids. We played "Karaoke Revolution Party", danced while making dinner... mostly just played. Emily told me that she's not seen me so hyper and fun. That killed me. Have I been fucked up so long that she doesn't remember? Are they all going to remember only Mommy hurts? Not Mommy has fun?
I've been working on designing a few new tattoos. I keep coming up with more ideas and sketching them out for Ian to take a gander. So far, I think I'm up to 10. 3 more and I'll have to stop. It's relaxing and helps me stay focused on something. Lordy knows I need focus!
One of my favorite artists is Salvador Dali. He was also a migraine sufferer (big surprise there, eh?). I found a picture of his meditative rose. I love roses (as cliche as they are) and am thinking of adding that rose in somewhere on my body.
Living with pain most of the time has definately become a burden. It's highly depressing, especially knowing that my kids are missing out on who I really am. I'm on an anti-depressant for the migraines. Hopefully, it'll help with the actual depression too.
I haven't talked to most of my friends. Amanda and folks I work with are about it. I haven't even called my Mom for days. I think it's more that I really don't want to talk about it. I know that things will be asked. And honestly, if I keep talking about it, I'll become a whiner. I can't stand being known as the whiner.
Jason actually didn't feel well today. He came home and went to bed. Slept til 9ish too! Then went back to bed! Ha! I do that all the time! I can tell that he's really getting annoyed with all the things that aren't getting done. So am I. But, it'll all be there tomorrow (most likely the next year or so). I need the family time.
I talked to Mike a bit on IM. Always a fun time, and I've really been missing him, Clint and the 776th gang. Hopefully, I'll be on more. I'm gonna try to anyway! If nothing else, I'm determined to be fixed by DNDO. If not, I think I'll cry!
Mostly I hung out with the kids. We played "Karaoke Revolution Party", danced while making dinner... mostly just played. Emily told me that she's not seen me so hyper and fun. That killed me. Have I been fucked up so long that she doesn't remember? Are they all going to remember only Mommy hurts? Not Mommy has fun?
I've been working on designing a few new tattoos. I keep coming up with more ideas and sketching them out for Ian to take a gander. So far, I think I'm up to 10. 3 more and I'll have to stop. It's relaxing and helps me stay focused on something. Lordy knows I need focus!
One of my favorite artists is Salvador Dali. He was also a migraine sufferer (big surprise there, eh?). I found a picture of his meditative rose. I love roses (as cliche as they are) and am thinking of adding that rose in somewhere on my body.
Living with pain most of the time has definately become a burden. It's highly depressing, especially knowing that my kids are missing out on who I really am. I'm on an anti-depressant for the migraines. Hopefully, it'll help with the actual depression too.
I haven't talked to most of my friends. Amanda and folks I work with are about it. I haven't even called my Mom for days. I think it's more that I really don't want to talk about it. I know that things will be asked. And honestly, if I keep talking about it, I'll become a whiner. I can't stand being known as the whiner.
Jason actually didn't feel well today. He came home and went to bed. Slept til 9ish too! Then went back to bed! Ha! I do that all the time! I can tell that he's really getting annoyed with all the things that aren't getting done. So am I. But, it'll all be there tomorrow (most likely the next year or so). I need the family time.
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